Observations

There are at least two ways of approaching the process of getting biologically older. They all depend on how you answer the question: Is this the time to cash in?

You played the game all your life. You could have done better. Nothing new. But you are satisfied. You are in good health and the time has come. You need to change and enjoy. Whatever that means. Stay warm (for us poor souls living in cold climates), seek new friends, and play golf.

Others do not feel comfortable with this idea. They keep searching, believing that “cashing in” is a different process. They look for a mental state different from what they experienced when they were active in business. The search is endless, and it may very well take them back to where they started.

I have been going through my search for some time. I have been reading about religions and various philosophical systems, trying to understand what other minds are thinking about our role and ultimate destination.

My experience is that the best answers are the simple ones. For this reason I have been attracted to Taoism, one of the oldest philosophical systems together with Confucianism. My escape is to read books on Taoism. They are mostly poor. But sometimes you find a gem.

Lately I read a book that was almost boring for its lack of depth. It dealt with the fact that we are all “connected”. The typical examples are that you are thinking about your son, and in that particular moment he calls. Or, you want to call a dear friend; you go out to get a cup of coffee and he comes in the same store. A few lines in the very last page of the book rewarded me for enduring the verbosity of the text.

All of us think we have a vision of the “truth”. But the real truth is that we will never be able to fully grasp what is boundless, infinite, and eternal. Assuming we actually live in an infinite, boundless, and eternal system. Assuming that what we see and experience actually exists. And we know for a fact that this is not the case.

Each one of us is trying from his/her vantage point, searching for an answer from a very personal perspective, looking through an irrelevant keyhole.

Maybe the answer is provided by all our efforts. Maybe the answer is the search itself, knowing all too well that what we find cannot be the truth.

I am just realizing, as I write, that this is the essence of Taoism. The realization that nothing exists. And the process of searching is the exercise we have to endure to awaken our mind. To find … nothing.

(This Observations appeared in the issue of 1/28/02 of The Peter Dag Portfolio)